


Down, Down

by CarnivalofBrokenDolls (yourrhinestoneeyes)



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Angst, Ed has a lot of problems, Ed has regrets as well, Gen, Sad, Slightly violent, canon character death, spoilers for episode 14
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-22 09:21:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9600941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourrhinestoneeyes/pseuds/CarnivalofBrokenDolls
Summary: Ed regretted it the second that Oswald's body hit the water.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like I haven't written in forever. This isn't that great, but something I kind of wanted to write cause I can see it sort of happening.

It was safe to say that Ed didn’t feel like himself when he pulled the trigger. He heard the gun go off, he heard the squelching sound as Oswald pressed his hands against his own stomach doing what he could in vain to stop the heavy flow of blood. Ed could see the scene, but his limbs felt heavy.

He felt as if he were being controlled by somebody else as he stared blankly into the pleading pain filled eyes of his friend. He reached for him, grabbed him by his shirt, and for a millisecond he began to pull Oswald away from the edge, but something clicked. He shoved him away, watched him fall into the cold waters below. He watched his body hit the water, could hear the heavy splash. Blue eyes that were losing their light watched him beneath the waves, hands reaching up towards him in one last attempt to touch something that was far gone.

Ed felt again, he felt himself draw in a burning breath then release it in a heavy exhale. He shook from the cold, from the rain, from the shock.

“Oh God”

No this was not what he wanted. He could feel a heavy weight on his shoulders, in his head he could hear a resounding laugh. He could feel the burn of tears filling his eyes, rolling down his cheeks. 

Without much thought, Ed found himself removing his jacket and his glasses, he dropped them to the ground. He walked to the edge and looked down into the water, he could still just faintly see the other man’s body. In his head, he could hear him, he could hear his less pleasant self threatening him, telling him he wouldn’t allow him to do something this stupid.

“Shut up” he snapped at himself, a moment later he dove into the water.

He pushed against the pressure of the water, he ignored the biting cold against his skin that made his muscles want to lock up. He reached forward with his hands as he swam deeper into the surrounding darkness. He felt like he had just left reality altogether, this was a realm of coldness and death.

He needed to reach Oswald, if he could reach him he could save him. He didn’t want to be alone.

‘Please don’t leave me alone with him, please don’t leave me with him.’

Ed touched Oswald’s fingertips, he could feel his cool skin against his and he swore that he felt his fingers curl in a futile attempt to grab hold of Ed. 

There was a heavy pressure in Ed’s chest, a burning in his lungs; he needed to go back up. Dead eyes still watched him, eyes that showed absolutely no sign of life and hadn’t for over two minutes now.

‘Let go’

‘You killed him, you idiot.’

‘The last person who loved you.’

Ed closed his eyes as he turned from the corpse of his friend and made his way back towards the surface, he broke through to the top taking in long deep breaths. His body inside and out was sore, he found himself screaming desperately with the knowledge that if anybody heard him they didn’t care. Again, he could feel himself losing control of his body as he swam towards the shore, this time he found himself fighting less than the times before. His other self was right, he had been right about everything.

‘It wasn’t like you loved him anyway.’

“I could have, I wanted to.” He replied to the voice only he could hear as he walked along the shore back to where his glasses and jacket still lay.

‘You showed your love for him just like you did with Kristen.’

Normally he’d argue, hit himself in the head repeatedly, and scream until he was red in the face and on the verge of passing out, but…..He was tired.

Ed felt himself dying, he was done of ruining his life. It was time to let him take control.


End file.
